We are excited to turn the page in 2021 and thankful for your support of the work we will be doing this new year! Support like yours allows our team the bandwidth to work at full capacity in this vital work of reintegration. We could not do this without people like you.
Despite the restrictions of COVID, Better Life made significant steps ahead in 2020. We continued to facilitate and support men and women from Federal Corrections Institutes (9 in our Pacific Region), we developed our relationship with Corrections Canada (including Pacific Region Institutions, Parole Offices and Officers, and Halfway Homes), and significantly increased the network of churches that we are able to integrate offenders into.
One of the areas we are most excited about for 2021 is the development of a training team. We are grateful for a number of individuals who bring wisdom and experience to developing Better Life training for the churches and volunteers we work with. This training will be a valuable resource as we continue to reduce recidivism and help parolees to begin to experience a new story and to live a better life.
J.’s message (below) is a fantastic reminder of just how powerful that work can be!
Hello,
My name is J., I was housed at William Head Institution for over two years and can say without a doubt that a big difference from any other institution is the volunteers. All of them, from all the groups to the ones who come in for chapel.
Many of the chapel volunteers have been there for years and have probably seen a few chaplains come and go. This gives us not only a continuation of support building to our release but a great help after it. I’ve been blessed for all the connections that I’ve been able to keep going after I got out, even despite covid.
Many Christians who come out of prison are either fooling themselves or don’t know where to turn to in a new city. The volunteers can be a great help to both as they continue to minister a safe circle of support and a good dose of a reality check.
It was one of the volunteers who connected me to the church I go to now who I’ve really connected with their pastor who did time in prison some 25+ years ago! The Lord has blessed me so much inside and outside of prison. I’ve grown in my walk with Jesus and others. I’ve helped with playing music in the chapel and now at church.
“I was in prison, and you came unto me.” (Matt. 25:36)
In Christ’s love and prayer,
J.
Thanks again for your support of the vital work of Better Life.
Our goal is for the content we share with you to be as meaningful and valuable as possible.
As mentioned previously, we want to use this space to develop and communicate the pathway Better Life supports men and women on as they move from eligibility for parole to integration into a faith community.
But at the same time, we recognize the importance of stories.
We recently shared some stories of transformation in the lives of men and women coming out of incarceration with the local church they have connected to—remotely via Zoom, of course—and many of the staff were brought to tears. God is clearly at work, and what He is doing in the lives of men and women both within the Corrections Institutions and out on parole is awesome!
So we’re going to start weaving in more storytelling into our content calendar, alternating between highlighting various aspects of the process of reintegration and practical resources, and sharing the powerful stories of our men and women.
I also want to invite you to sign up as one of our prayer partners. Reintegration can be challenging.
We would love to have you praying with us for the men and women coming out of Corrections and practical needs and challenges they face.
Email us at prayerforbetterlife@gmail.com to join the list and get regular monthly and as-needed urgent prayer requests.
If you are a part of a faith community or ministry team already supporting an individual who is incarcerated or paroled, please email us prayer requests at prayerforbetterlife@gmail.com so we can pass those along to our prayer partners on a monthly basis. (Please write “urgent” in the subject line if it’s time-sensitive so we know to share it right away!)
Today we’re sharing the story of one of our care recipients.
YC had been doing well for a number of years after a significant time of incarceration. He is married and is meaningfully employed.
However, like with many the men and women we support, the COVID-19 pandemic, with all of its many changes and challenges, has had a significant impact on his well being.
YC recently violated a condition of his parole and was in lock-up for 48 hours—but came to a powerful understanding through his difficult experience.
He wrote his support network these words:
Dear friends,
I am writing this letter because I have been struggling very much in the last few months. My stressors have been building up and I have been having difficulties dealings with all of this.
I was locked up at the Chilliwack RCMP detachment for 48 hours on Easter Sunday. I was released on the following Tuesday. I was detained because of a breach on my parole conditions.
On Easter Saturday, feeling really depressed and overwhelmed with a lot of the stressors in my life, I went to visit a friend and started to feel really depressed. I started to drink one beer after another. After a couple I thought that I might as well keep drinking because I realized that I have already (messed) up, one or twelve doesn’t make a difference on (messing) up. I didn’t want to risk driving my vehicle anywhere, especially under the influence. I haven’t drank for so many years and not having had anything to eat all day, the drinking really hit me hard. I ended up sleeping there on their couch.
There was also very poor cell reception, so that I didn’t communicate at all with my (wife). (My wife) was extremely concerned about my whereabouts, she didn’t know if I had committed suicide, ran off the road and was laying at the bottom of a ditch or ravine somewhere. What I have done was extremely selfish and irresponsible. My bad choice of actions that Easter Saturday with dealing with my stressors and depression was out of character for me. I am truly sorry for having put (my wife), her family and all of my support group through hell by not having been able to deal with this in a better way.
It is too simple to say that this proves that I am only human, but no, I should have known better. This incident has made me realized that one of the contributing factors for this shortcoming is that I have been trying to deal with some issues by myself. In the last few years I have been distancing myself from my support group that I have built over the years.
I have now realized that I have the need to reconnect and tighten my support group. Realizing that I can’t do this on my own, I can’t deal with all my stressors all at once. I can deal with those stressors when they are one at the time, but when I let them pile up I get extremely overwhelmed and my depression goes into overdrive. Unfortunately, I have a difficult time opening up and sharing my weaknesses because I don’t want to burden anyone. That’s the reason that my response to “How are you?” is usually “fine.”
So I am reaching out to all of you, in the hope that I haven’t lost your friendships, trust, love and support. I am truly sorry if I have let anyone of you down. I’m so grateful to have my dear wife by my side to support me through these difficult times, but my wife cannot be my only support, because of my history, this is way too much for even her to handle. That is the reason why I need to reconnect with all of you.
Please pray for YC. His story represents the very real challenges of reintegration, as well as the game-changer having a supportive faith community can be in the lives of the men and women we care for.
I love when someone says something that brings clarity.
One of my favourite educators, Tim Elmore, made the valuable distinction between social distancing and physical distancing in a recent episode of his Leading the Next Generation podcasts.
What Elmore observed is that “social” distancing—a term being widely communicated during this season of pandemic—is actually not a good description of what we’re being asked to do, and may even be harmful for our mental health.
What he’s referring to is this widespread sense of unease as we try to cope with our new pandemic-influenced reality, and how that translates into how we interact with each other.
Or perhaps even how we ignore each other.
You may have experienced, like I have, people literally turning themselves away as they pass by. No eye contact. No acknowledgement.
It’s an unsettling experience.
The distinction Elmore makes so well is that this is absolutely a time for “physical” distancing.
We need to make a concerted effort to put more space than we’re used to between each other to “flatten the curve” of COVID-19, limit exposure, and keep cases to a trickle rather than a river until a vaccine is available.
However, while all of that is true,
social engagement and relational closeness are more important than ever.
What I found so relevant in that interview was the idea that, in this cultural moment, we’re experiencing a loneliness crisis on a global scale.
Loneliness—a lack of meaningful connection with others—impacts us physically, in terms of our health and longevity, but also—and this is especially relevant when we think about incarceration—in Dr. Murthy’s words:
loneliness is “a root cause and contributor to many of the epidemics sweeping the world today, from alcohol and drug addiction to violence to depression and anxiety.”
So, let me encourage you today to recognize the distinction between “social” distancing (harmful if taken literally) and “physical” distancing (essential in flattening the COVID-19 pandemic curve).
Perhaps you can be a catalyst for helping the people around you experience connection in creative ways.
Devote at least 15 minutes each day to connecting with those you most care about. (In this season of pandemic use the ‘tools of connection’ – video, phone, conversation with appropriate physical distance).
Focus on each other.
Forget about multitasking and give the other person the gift of your full attention, making eye contact, if possible, and genuinely listening.
Embrace solitude.
The first step toward building stronger connections with others is to build a stronger connection with oneself. Meditation, prayer, art, music, and time spent outdoors can all be sources of solitary comfort and joy.
Help and be helped.
Service is a form of human connection that reminds us of our value and purpose in life. Checking on a neighbour, seeking advice, even just offering a smile to a stranger six feet away, all can make us stronger.
Better Life Integration & Support Society 
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